The Importance Of Independence
And why you shouldn't be afraid to be alone!
Independence is the ability to look out for yourself and your personal responsibilities while considering your impact on society and the environment around you.
How to be alone is something I've leaned this past year.
I found myself very unsure of who I was as an individual and became addicted to validation. It may have been my increased use of social media, which tends to create a need for validation, or the depressive episode I was slowly getting out of after a whole year. Either way I knew I needed a change.
I had to do something about it...
So I took the summer off, deleted my social media and spent time on myself. I didn't go out much and worked hard on being alone.
That was the key, I had to spend time completely alone but not idle. So I started with the easy things that made me feel good.
Self-care doing face masks and listening to my favourite songs on Spotify. Cleaning my apartment and writing out my goals.
I went shopping alone, bought my favourite food and watched movies on the couch.
Little things that kept me occupied but content.
The harder part came when I started to think about the things that were no longer serving me.
I had grown over the past year and needed to let go of bad habits. So I quit smoking weed. which I did almost everyday (I had used smoking a as coping mechanism while I was depressed.) I needed to be mindful and experience life as me and not an inebriated version of myself.
That helped with my thought process as I became more aware of my emotions and decisions. Life became more real to me.
I began being present and life became what I wanted it to be instead of what was going to happen. Living in the moment made me more comfortable being alone.
This led me to have more time to think about what I wanted in the future and what I had to do now to achieve it.
I started working backwards.
"I'm here now and I need to build my self-confidence or my goals won't turn out as I hope." I was so focused on the present actions necessary to reach my future goals that they became real and attainable in my mind because I am in control.
So after spending 3 months by myself enjoying the present moment, loving who I am and only focusing on what I can change I've realized I don't care about what anyone else has to say. I don't need to be validated because my creator says I am worthy and I know I can make it.
The importance of independence is not who needs you, but how much you need yourself. That's why you should never be afraid to be alone.